I am not going to lie. Today was a hard art day. Today was full of day of eating my favorite flavor of “Shit Sandwich” In Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Big Magic she talks about how in every creative persons life there are going to be more days than not, when creating is just hard. When it sucks. When you pour your heart and soul into something and it just never comes together. This was one of those days. The question is; for me anyway is how do I handle these days when I make “bad art” or “ugly art” or art that has so many flaws…
I did not handle it gracefully. I had a complete meltdown. I actually threw away the first piece and sat at my art table and cried like a 3 year old. When I am having days like this I go to my mentor and friend Petra. She makes imperfect girls, and they are lovely. She is amazing at remembering the joy is in the process not the outcome. She told me that she had a feeling a day like this was coming. My response was that I did not know that! I knew there where going to be hard days. I knew there where days I would struggle to find the girl in the painting…but I never thought I would not find her…I had this idea in my head that if I truly give her my everything she would come together and be beautiful.
She encouraged me to give into the “ugly” So once I pulled my self together and had a break I went back to her and gave into the ugly. I did not worry about what was technically correct or making her look realistic. I just followed my intuition and played with the colors.
Learning to create with Joy when things don’t go my way and learning how to give into the “ugly” are so much easier said then done. But the truth is, I will eat this shit sandwich every day until I get to the other side; because not creating in fear of making something bad is so much worse then making “bad” art.
Here she is completed. I gave her all I had and that is enough.
I am not asking for feedback today. But please tell me in the comments below how you handle your “bad days“